TTR - Week 8 RUDY'S

Week 8 - Rudy Edition

It was a dark and stormy night. You're standing outside, trying to get reception to live bet MNF. Then you saw something in the distance. It was just a flicker at first—something small, hunched, and still in the distance. I thought maybe it was a stray animal, a shadow, or just my eyes playing tricks in the dim orange glow of the streetlight. But the longer I stared, the less certain I became. It wasn’t moving, yet I could feel it watching me. The air grew colder, the silence heavier, and every instinct told me to look away. I almost did—until it twitched.

That's right bitches, It's me! I thought I'd get used to doing the Rudy TTR and let Blas handing the big leagues. This was the beginning of bye week hell and with a shit ton of injuries, it was a fun week to fill out a roster. Not that any of you guys would know anything about that. You could go and pick up Alvin Kamara off the waiver wire in Rudy. Let's see who rose to the top of the dung heap this week.

Top UN vs. I Chase Brown People - They better run

Two things can be true at the same time. 1) Scoring 76 points in a 6 man league is unfathomably bad. I'm not sure how it's even possible really. Commish managed to field the Worst Team all on his own. You left 20 points on the bench, what is Michael Fucking Pittman not good enough for you??? 2) Even if you had started Pittman you would have gotten blown out. Lamar was supposed to be back, but he wasn't and then Dak took a Dump. Such is life. Let's check in on the winner of this matchup, oh he started a guy who was out, incredible. London was calling, but no one was home. Garrett scored nearly 130 points, he must be doing really well. Oh he started a guy who didn't place? Nice. He just got his SECOND win? Nice. Another year in Rudy? Intolerable. 

Uncle Moosknuckle vs. Was Top Now Bottom - Angel is actually a switch because he topped this one

Blas opened up with 2 holes in his lineup and Angel was more than happy to cum in. Starting Jake Ferguson makes sense, he's been going off in recent weeks. In no universe is starting the Bungles defense acceptable. I know they're playing the Jets, I know they're playing Justin Fields, but my brother in Christ, 26 teams played this week and 24 of those defenses scored more points than the Bungles. Not only that, Cincinnati Defense is 31st in fantasy points for the season. They say rape victims are never to blame, but you definitely deserved it. Angel evens up his record with solid performances from up and down the lineup. This game was never close. Angel fucks with all sorts of guys, white guys, black guys, Hawaiian guys, big guys, small guys, all the guys! Very diverse set of holes. 

Dr. Orders vs. IM A MANGINA - The Doctor is IN

I don't wanna shit on Nick too much, he's a fun guy and always shows up. He's even such an LGBTQ Ally that he refused to bench Gay even though he wasn't playing. We stand supportive king. Also, you can change your name now we're like 20 games in. Onto Cory. Is this Peak Rudy? The final form of Rudy? Is this Democracy Manifest? Is this a succulent Chinese meal? Goddamn, everyone on Cory's team scored 30 fucking points, even the Defense. 200 points in 1/2 PPR is in itself a true accomplishment. I don't know what the odds are, but I'm putting down on Cory to win his 3rd Rudy championship. I don't actually know whether that's an accomplishment or not, it's certainly something. Certainly worth jacking off to at least. 

Worst Team

QB Baker - 5.6

RB Bijan 4.3

RB Dowdle - 5.4

WR Egbuka - 5

WR LONDON - 0

TE Fergaliscious - 0

FLEX Engram - 5.6

K GAAAAYEE - 0 

D Bungles 0 

TOTAL: 25.9

You guys start A LOT of people who get goose eggs, I know you only have 3 bench slots, but you still have to like to win games and stuff. This was fun, maybe I'll stick to doing Rudy, JUUUUSSSST KIDDING. 

ALL HAIL MANCHILD